Armor!

ElvishPillager wrote this merry song (no melody yet) about roguelikes and armor.

I thought it was a really great read!

Armor

When there's monsters at your back,
and your fortune's looking black,
and you've lost your kith and kin,
what's left to protect your skin?
Armor! Armor!
refrain: It protects your skin from harmer!
refrain: It keeps up the monsters' karmer
refrain: and with the ladies it's a charmer!

And suppose you're in the town,
with a golden crown of beauty,
all the shopkeeps feel a duty
to rebate some of that booty!
As your AU's going down,
you're just glad you've got that crown,
because it's armor! It's armor!
(refrain)

And down in the dungeon low,
And you start to get in trouble,
and you exit on the double
but the monsters tunnel rubble
and you've missed your saving throw,
and you're thinking, "oh, OH NO!",
but then something stops the blow,
What's the something? Now you know!
It's armor! It's armor!
(refrain)

Then when Morgoth comes to call,
and he smashes through the wall,
and he stands above you tall,
and you watch his hammer fall,
as he hits you with his all,
naught will save you from his maul...
except for armor! Your armor!
(refrain)

Then when everything is done,
and you think you've finally won,
and it's time to have some fun,
then that Elf comes from nowhere,
and asks you the Void to dare,
and you wonder how you'll fare,
you recall your Cloak of Air...
You could stay as king or farmer
but you'll go into the void
'cause you've got armor!